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Courtship Isn’t What You Think

Perhaps you’ve heard of courtship before, maybe had a friend or two that’s done it, but deep down (probably not even too deep), you view courtship as an outmoded version of romance.

Honestly, that’s totally cool. I get it. Courtship calls to mind elegant dresses and the phrase “gentleman caller,” which may be all well and good in a Jane Austen novel, but that’s not modern life.

But I also think some things get misinterpreted along the way. Courtship isn’t strictly about how you go about a romantic relationship, it’s about the why.

In fact, let’s get rid of the label of “courtship,” because that’s hardly what it’s about. Let’s call it something else, like “surrendering the pen of your love story to your loving Heavenly Father.” It’s a bit wordier, granted, but it’s much, much more accurate.

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An Open Letter to the Christian Caught in Sin

Being a Christian and finding yourself still struggling with sin can be very confusing. As I touched on a few weeks ago, we can tend to feel an immense amount of guilt and assume that God sees us the way we see ourselves—dirty, horrible, unlovable—but the super cool thing about becoming a Christian is that we now wear the righteousness of Christ. To God, it is as though we never sinned.

(This doesn’t mean we don’t need to worry about repentance. It just means that when we fall, we should repent, get up, and keep going.)

I know what it’s like to mess up. And I know what it’s like to swear I’ll never do it again and soon find myself in that same exact place, wondering when God is going to decide I’m not worth the trouble and give up.

But He won’t. He never ever will, and that’s what I wanted to remind you of. Continue reading


This is Why You Still Feel Guilty

These past several months I’ve been thinking a lot about how two aspects of myself can exist simultaneously: I’m a Christian, and yet I still sin.

Being a good person has always been one of the most important things to me. Even before I got saved, when I realized I did something wrong I was flooded with guilt and remorse. Whether it was something as big as looking my parents in the face and lying to them or as seemingly small as excluding my younger brother, I felt it all. There have been countless tears spent on my part, lamenting that I’m not a better person.

And those feelings haven’t gone away just because I surrendered my heart to Christ a few years ago. In fact, they’ve intensified.

“I should be better now,” I tell myself through gritted teeth. “It should be easier.”

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Why I’m Still Single

I’m a little bit different. I’ve never had a boyfriend, never been kissed.

Never been left by myself to pick up the pieces, wondering what I did that caused this guy who promised eternal love and devotion to toss me aside and move on to someone else.

But it’s not a fear of pain that has shaped my decision. It’s not because I think I don’t need a man or because I don’t want to get married. Continue reading